“I Thought I Was Healed! Why Am I Still Struggling?!"

“I Thought I Was Healed! Why Am I Still Struggling?!"

Have you ever wondered, “Where did my healing go?”

“But I’ve prayed about this!”

“I’ve done all this work! I’ve had so much prayer ministry. I’ve experienced so much healing—why am I still struggling with this stuff?” 

If that’s you, take heart. There is a process with healing, and this might surprise you, but much of that process looks like discipline. 

All of us—even those who have been around Elijah House or other healing ministries for years—still have to walk through the discipline of healing. We are like patients recovering after a surgery, and for some of us, that surgery was extensive! 

Here are a few ways you can embrace your healing and really start walking it out.

Speak aloud the truth about your new life, not your old life. 

You really have been healed. You are a new person now. Let your words reflect the new you and not the old you.  

“This is who Jesus says I am. This is what His Word says. It doesn’t matter how I happen to feel today—I am going to believe His truth.”  

Make one small choice at a time until the right choice becomes second nature.  

The old you may have said, “When I feel afraid, this is how I react. I panic. I start pushing away the people who are close to me. I run.” 

But the healed you says, “When I am afraid, I run to the Lord because I know He will take care of me.”

The old you may have said, “When I don’t get what I want, I get angry and threaten the people who stand in my way.” 

But the healed you says, “God’s way is more important to me than my way. It is better for me to respond in love, even when I’m having a disagreement with somebody.”  

When you find yourself feeling a familiar pain or in some way re-experiencing what was healed, react in faith, not doubt.  

Dealing with the root of an issue really does bring healing to that place in your heart. 

Dealing with the root removes the compulsion (the pressure to react in a sinful way), but there may still be some empty habits you need to overcome. Habits take time to break and change. 

When you realize you’re dealing with a now-empty habit from the past, this is good news! That habit will be much easier to break now, on this side of your healing. 

If, however, you find yourself dealing with a particularly “sticky” habit, go to the Lord and ask Him what is going on. Here are four possibilities:  

1. It could be that you need healing in other places. If heart healing is like surgery, it might be that you need additional surgery somewhere else. The surgery on your foot was successful, and now you need surgery on your knee. 

2. God could be teaching you a new way to think and behave—a beautiful way that matches your heart healing. Before we are healed, all of us build “structures” that match our wounding. These are behaviors, practices, and patterns of response that are sinful and painful. After we are healed, these structures need to be torn down, so we can behave and respond according to our freedom as children of God. 

3. It could be a “counterfeiting spirit.” This is a spirit that imitates old mindsets and emotions that God has already healed. Sometimes God “allows” this harassment in order to break us out of passivity. 

“No, I will NOT give in to this any longer.” 

“I refuse to live in fear anymore.” 

“No, I am done with this addiction, and I will not keep feeding it.” 

“I am going to reach for God instead of reaching for anger. I’m done with human anger forever.” 

If you suspect you are dealing with a counterfeiting spirit, treat it according to James 4:7: “Resist the devil, and he will flee from you” (NASB). 

4. You could be experiencing normal emotional reactions. The root problem is healed, but you still need to process the emotions you didn’t or couldn’t process in the past. 

If this is what you are dealing with, get around faithful people who will listen to you as you talk out your everyday feelings and struggles. Seek the comfort you need instead of ignoring or stuffing your emotions. Choose to stop living in fear, and practice being bold and having good conversations. 

Finally, ask God which spiritual disciplines you need to adopt in your life.  

In the past—before your healing—spiritual disciplines probably felt like work

“Ugh. Why am I doing this? This is so boring.”  

Heart healing makes spiritual disciplines more effective. If you faithfully commit to doing the disciplines the Lord puts on your heart, you will find yourself growing and getting stronger. 

Depending on your background, you may not even know what people mean when they talk about “spiritual disciplines.” Here’s a list that might be helpful. 

(Keep in mind that the Lord is doing something unique, not rote, with you. You don’t need to do “whatever everybody else is doing.” Instead, let the Holy Spirit take you on an adventure with Him.)  

• Spend time reading God’s Word. 
• Start keeping a journal. Record your prayers, thoughts, feelings, everything you feel like God is saying to you, etc.  
• Find a great devotional, and go through it thoughtfully. Pay attention to anything the Lord highlights to you in or through the devotional, and write down His words. 
• Read biographies of the faithful children of God who also struggled but saw victory. 
• Learn to incline the ear of your heart to His voice.  
• Feed your spirit with music, art, nature, etc.  
• Start taking communion on a regular basis. 

You are not alone as you learn how to walk out your healing. Everybody is in the same process of learning the discipline of healing. In the eyes of your Father, you are likely doing better than you think you are.  

For more on this topic, check out the following Elijah House resource: 

 Sealing Our Healing (MP3)

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